Parents Need Emotional Support During the Adoption Process

Illinois adoption lawyersAdoption, though generally a positive experience, can be an emotionally trying process. In fact, few families are truly prepared for the toll of adoption. For this reason, it is critical that friends and family members know how to effectively support the prospective adopting parents in their lives. The following information offers tips and strategies, and it explains how the assistance of a seasoned attorney can help to ease the process and improve the outcome of an Illinois adoption case.

Lend a Hand When You Can

Like most parents, those who are planning to adopt often fear that asking for help will reflect negatively on them. Those who have been there know better – every parent needs help sometimes, especially in the beginning. So, rather than wait for an invitation to show up, simply lend a hand when and where you can. Drop by with a casserole, show up with cleaning supplies in hand, or simply be there for them if an adoption falls through. You never know when your emotional support will be the one thing that gets them through.

Write a Reference Letter

References (or background letters from friends, family, and members of the community) are one of the major elements in an adoption case. Sadly, prospective adopting parents often struggle with knowing where to turn for such letters. Perhaps they fear that others do not see them as potential parents, or they may feel as though they are burdening others by asking. Either way, you can save them some stress and worry by simply providing them with a reference letter. Keep in mind that they may not use it – especially if they have others that offer a better “picture” of the type of parents they hope to be – but the fact that you have offered, without them asking, may help them feel more confident on their journey to parenthood.

Resist the Urge to Offer Unsolicited Advice 

While seasoned parents may think they are helping prospective adopting parents by offering unsolicited advice, this is rarely the case. In fact, most adopting parents have done their research, and are often pretty aware of the parenting methods and strategies they want to try, and even those that are still deciding have a pretty clear understanding of the various options. Of course, if they ask for your opinion or thoughts, share and be honest about your opinions! Otherwise, try to recognize that unsolicited advice may contribute to their overwhelm and resist the urge to give it.

Offer Financial Relief If You Can

Having a child is an expensive undertaking, regardless of how you go about it. However, biological parents often have months (sometimes even longer) to prepare. They also have insurance to cover at least some of their costs, but this is rarely ever the case with adoption. Instead, the prospective parents may be responsible for everything from adoption fees and court costs to the birthing costs of the biological mother. If you can, offer them financial relief. If not, encourage them to seek the aid of an attorney. It may seem like an added expense at first, but when one considers the time and energy that can be saved, the value becomes more clear.

With more than 40 years of legal experience, Stock, Carlson, Oldfield & McGrath, LLC is the firm to call. Committed to providing growing families with advocacy and support, our DuPage County adoption lawyers can help prospective parents navigate the adoption process with less stress. No matter what the circumstances, we pursue the most favorable outcome possible. Call 630-665-2500 and schedule a personalized consultation today.


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