DuPage County divorce lawyersWhile many parents have come to realize that an amicable divorce is a more favorable approach, there are some who just cannot get along. Perhaps there has been a history of abuse, or maybe one party is set on alienating the other. Thankfully, even in such scenarios, there are strategies that parents can use to preserve and protect the best interests of their children throughout the divorce process. Learn more in the following sections, including how the assistance of a seasoned and competent divorce attorney can improve the outcome of a contentious Illinois divorce.

Focusing on the Children

Perhaps the most effective strategy that one can use to mitigate the risk of troubles in a contentious divorce is to ensure that the focus remains on the children. Do not discuss personal matters with your spouse, and do not ask about their private life. Avoid arguing about the past (as well as the future), and leave money issues to be settled in court or mediation.

Agree to Disagree

No two people parent the same, so it is highly unlikely that you will condone or agree with everything that your spouse does with your children. However, it is essential to keep in mind that your spouse's relationship with your children is now separate from yours, and unless there are safety concerns, you do not have any say over how they parent. So, when it comes to minor issues, such as what time the children should go to bed on the weekends, it may be best if you and your spouse resolve to agree to disagree.

Use an Alternative Means of Communication 

You and your spouse may be forever tied to one another through your children, but you do not have to communicate with them in person. In fact, face-to-face contact is typically discouraged in a contentious divorce, and parties usually encouraged to find other means of communication. Some parents find that timed phone conversations are an effective way to discuss child-related matters. Others do best with email communication. Just make sure you do not use your child to relay messages to your spouse, either during the divorce or after it has been finalized.

How Our DuPage County Divorce Lawyers Can Help

In addition to using an alternative means of communication, parents can use their attorney to negotiate with their spouse during the divorce process. With more than 40 years of experience, Stock, Carlson, Oldfield & McGrath, LLC is the firm to trust. Our DuPage County divorce lawyers prioritize the best interests of children, and we offer the personalized services that you deserve. Schedule your free initial consultation to get started. Call 630-665-2500.





Posted in Children | Tagged , , , , |

Wheaton divorce lawyersMost people recognize that divorce can be an emotionally painful process, but the financial complexities and challenges of this process are often overlooked. When this happens, it can place parties at an increased risk of experiencing financial devastation after a divorce. Learn how to mitigate your risks in the following sections, and discover how you can best deal with the financial loss that may occur during your Illinois divorce.

The Risk of Financial Loss in Divorce

Not all parties run the risk of financial loss in divorce, but it is an exceptionally common issue. Couples that have children, parties engaged in a high-asset divorce, and disadvantaged spouses tend to have the highest risk. However, even low-income couples, couples without children, and two-income households need to prepare for the possibility of a financial loss. More specifically, divorcing parties should prepare, long before the start of the divorce, to smooth the transition. Of course, not all parties have this luxury; some may not even be aware that a divorce is about to start. In these situations, careful planning and the aid of an experienced legal professional are critical to reducing the impact of a financial loss during your Illinois divorce.

Mitigating Your Risks in Divorce                              

If parties have the time to plan for a divorce, and if the relationship is amicable enough to create a debt elimination plan, parties are encouraged to work together to minimize the impact of any financial losses that they may experience. Otherwise, divorcing parties are encouraged to take small but critical actions that can improve their financial situation, both while the divorce is underway, and long into the future. Such actions could include:

  • Setting small, attainable financial goals;
  • Ensuring the marital estate is accurately valued;
  • Gaining a clear understanding of your overall financial picture (assets, debts, goals, etc.);
  • Creating a savings plan;
  • Re-evaluating your financial goals and making new ones;
  • Freezing discretionary and unnecessary spending;
  • Increasing your income or adding additional streams of income (i.e. a home business);
  • Downsizing to ensure you are not living above your means; and
  • Keeping a financial journal to monitor goals, spending, and progress.

Our DuPage County Divorce Lawyers Can Help

When going through a divorce, it is critical that you have a clear understanding of how your finances will be impacted. Stock, Carlson, Oldfield & McGrath, LLC, can analyze your situation, explain your options, and assist you in pursuing the most favorable settlement possible for your case. Get the representation you deserve. Contact our DuPage County divorce lawyers at 630-665-2500 and schedule a personalized and confidential consultation today.



Posted in Divorce | Tagged , , , , |

Illinois family law attorneysDivorce can be a mentally, emotionally, and financially complex process for all involved parties, but children tend to be the most vulnerable. Age, developmental stage, and family dynamics all may play a role in a child's ability to cope and understand the changes happening within their family, and that can impact their likelihood of experiencing maladjustment during or after the divorce. Learn how you can mitigate against the adverse effects of divorce in your child, based on their age, and discover what an experienced divorce lawyer can do to help.

Infants and Toddlers

Infants and toddlers may not understand the changes that are occurring in their family during the divorce process – nor could they, really – but that does not mean they are immune from the negative effects. In fact, they may be more prone to long-term issues if there is a great deal of stress and contention during the divorce because their brains and immune systems are still developing. As such, parents should be especially diligent in protecting their child from the potential consequences of divorce. You can do this by maintaining a routine that is as close to "normal" as possible and ensuring the child has ample time with both parents (unless the environment would be considered unfit or unsafe).

Younger Children (Elementary School)

While younger children may still lack the ability to fully grasp the impact of divorce, they do typically recognize that their life is going to change. Perhaps they have a friend at school who has experienced a divorce, or maybe they have watched a family go through it on television. In either case, they may develop fears, anxieties, or worries over what life will look like once the divorce is over. Parents can help ease these concerns by being honest and straightforward with about the upcoming changes. Just be sure to keep in mind that your child does not need every detail, as this could do them more harm than good. Instead, focus on the changes that will directly impact your child and strive to ease any worries they may have over losing a parent.

Tweens and Teens (Middle School and High School)

Older children have almost undoubtedly watched a friend go through a divorce, and they have a better understanding of how relationships work. Because of this, some teens and tweens will make snap judgments about the divorce and why it has occurred. Alternatively, a child in this developmental stage may become depressed or they may develop anxiety; changes in social life and pressures, fears over the future, and contention within the family can further increase the odds of such issues. Parents can mitigate against the ill effects of divorce in tweens and teens by being open and honest about the divorce (while also being mindful of the child's feelings for both parents), and by being supportive and listening to their child's fears and concerns.

How Our DuPage County Divorce Lawyers Can Help

Divorce can be difficult for any couple, but those with children have additional challenges and obstacles to overcome. Life together does not simply end; it changes. You become co-parents instead of partners. Stock, Carlson, Oldfield & McGrath, LLC help you transition successfully by providing your family with the support, knowledge, and experience you need. Schedule your initial consultation with our DuPage County divorce lawyers to get started. Call 630-665-2500 today.




Posted in Child Custody | Tagged , , , , |